Faith...or none. This is a wonderful, thoughtful, heartfelt reflection that I enjoyed reading. Hats off, Ken. Keep writing in a way that embraces all who read.
On the disconnection front, I've found that the disconnectors rarely agree that they cut someone off, and never admit that they did so for believing differently. It's always "in love", "for your good", and "because of [specific sin]." Coincidentally, that "love" and "good" and "sin" show up depressingly predictably when a person has a deep enough disagreement with a “fundamental” belief.
Our ingroup and outgroup thinking is definitely some crap-filled bathwater. It served us well for thousands - if not millions or billions - of years, but our world is much smaller now, and our ingroup is the inhabitants of earth. It’s time we realize the harmony we’re going to need in order to continue thriving on this pale, blue dot.
Thank you, Jamin, for your comments. I'm glad you found the essay meaningful - your story matters. As I wrote, it grieves me deeply to think that religion can force a parent to choose "right doctrine" over one's own child/grandchild. It's a tragic consequence of toxic tribalism in the name of "biblical Christianity." Sadly, religious scenes like the nativity can and do create deep visceral reactions for those who have been injured, abused, victimized and/or terrorized. You're correct to point it out.
This is great. If I learned anything in church, it was how to overextend analogies, so if you'll allow me... :)
I might think your baby is ugly...even hideous...even traumatizing, if you brought it into my house and it burned the place down. In fact, many young couples have decided they don't want kids for similar reasons, missing out on some of the most fulfilling experiences they could have, just because they couldn't distinguish between hating all kids and merely hating others' kids.
I might advise them not to look at the demon-child, but to look at the parents who love that demon-child, because this must be a crazy-fulfilling experience if it's even worth it when you produce a brat like that! There may not be a way to replicate that experience, and choosing not to have a baby might not be the great relief you're thinking. In fact, it might actually cause some anxiety you weren't expecting.
Likewise, my current religious hypothesis is that the metaphorical baby I must keep is the awe, wonder, and divine connection between - in this case - you and the baby in the manger. Maybe Jesus - even baby Jesus - is too traumatic a character to welcome into the life of an ex-Christian. But throughout history, our species keeps reinventing this god dude and finding deep fulfillment in it. He/she/it/they have played a massive role in our societies for as long as we've had societies, so let's not too hastily assume we can just discard it without any repercussions.
Faith...or none. This is a wonderful, thoughtful, heartfelt reflection that I enjoyed reading. Hats off, Ken. Keep writing in a way that embraces all who read.
On the disconnection front, I've found that the disconnectors rarely agree that they cut someone off, and never admit that they did so for believing differently. It's always "in love", "for your good", and "because of [specific sin]." Coincidentally, that "love" and "good" and "sin" show up depressingly predictably when a person has a deep enough disagreement with a “fundamental” belief.
Our ingroup and outgroup thinking is definitely some crap-filled bathwater. It served us well for thousands - if not millions or billions - of years, but our world is much smaller now, and our ingroup is the inhabitants of earth. It’s time we realize the harmony we’re going to need in order to continue thriving on this pale, blue dot.
Thank you, Jamin, for your comments. I'm glad you found the essay meaningful - your story matters. As I wrote, it grieves me deeply to think that religion can force a parent to choose "right doctrine" over one's own child/grandchild. It's a tragic consequence of toxic tribalism in the name of "biblical Christianity." Sadly, religious scenes like the nativity can and do create deep visceral reactions for those who have been injured, abused, victimized and/or terrorized. You're correct to point it out.
This is great. If I learned anything in church, it was how to overextend analogies, so if you'll allow me... :)
I might think your baby is ugly...even hideous...even traumatizing, if you brought it into my house and it burned the place down. In fact, many young couples have decided they don't want kids for similar reasons, missing out on some of the most fulfilling experiences they could have, just because they couldn't distinguish between hating all kids and merely hating others' kids.
I might advise them not to look at the demon-child, but to look at the parents who love that demon-child, because this must be a crazy-fulfilling experience if it's even worth it when you produce a brat like that! There may not be a way to replicate that experience, and choosing not to have a baby might not be the great relief you're thinking. In fact, it might actually cause some anxiety you weren't expecting.
Likewise, my current religious hypothesis is that the metaphorical baby I must keep is the awe, wonder, and divine connection between - in this case - you and the baby in the manger. Maybe Jesus - even baby Jesus - is too traumatic a character to welcome into the life of an ex-Christian. But throughout history, our species keeps reinventing this god dude and finding deep fulfillment in it. He/she/it/they have played a massive role in our societies for as long as we've had societies, so let's not too hastily assume we can just discard it without any repercussions.
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